Easter Sunday

"He is not here; he has risen!"

Luke 24:6

Easter has always been one of my favorite holidays. As a Christian it is, to me, the most important day regarding my faith. Christmas is special too, and I definitely love all of the traditions associated with Christmas. But if it weren't for the cross and the empty tomb, Christmas would be just another day.

This year, as anyone might have predicted, we had a very emotional day. As we sat in the pew at church, singing songs of Jesus "trampling over death by death," and words like "in You death has lost its sting," it hit me in a whole new way. We experienced death on a whole new level this year. Losing a precious child is something that we just never dreamed of, and the sting of it has been, at times, unbearable. But, because Jesus conquered death {for us}, we know that Caroline did, too. And, in that, we know that we will one day do the same and one day be reunited with our precious angel. So, right there in the pew, holding hands with my sweet friend Stacey, I did the ugly cry. The really ugly cry. It was an amazing time of worship and healing, and recognizing the true sacrifice along with the true significance of it all. What an amazing and most precious God we serve. (To hear the music scroll down to the bottom and push the "pause" button before you press play.)

This was Bryson's idea of an Easter outfit. He is usually only allowed to have his pacifier in bed, so not sure why he had it here. Definitely made for a cute photo op...

After church we drove about an hour and a half to my Grandmother's house for lunch and an Easter egg hunt. My Grandma's lawn mower {known as the tractor to Bryson} had broken down, so she got a new one before we came. She knows how much B loves to ride it with PawPaw! Bryson could not wait to get there!

Cupcakes that my Mom made.

Before the egg hunt...

Always with that tongue out! It is necessary to get any task accomplished. :)

A look of mischievousness when he discovered what the silly string was for...

And finally- on the tractor with PawPaw!

We were blessed with beautiful weather and a great afternoon spent celebrating our Savior with those we love.

Happy Easter!

Miracle Farm

Last weekend (the day before Easter) we decided to spend the day at a fundraising event for Miracle Farm. Miracle Farm is a working ranch that houses troubled teen boys. They are able to work and in return receive room and board, and an education. I heard about it on the radio {just once!}, and am so glad that we looked it up and decided to go. Our friends the MacDonalds and the Johnstons joined us. The weather was gorgeous and the kids {and adults} had a blast. There was a bluegrass band playing, a petting zoo, roping practice, beautiful wildflowers, a barbecue lunch, and free Blue Bell ice cream. Doesn't get much better than that!

Quote of the day:
"Let's get out of here before these kids learn to read." -Jared MacDonald

At the top of the BIG slide!

And somehow Miss Annabel also found her way to the top. Not sure why any of us ever doubted she could...

Lunch!

It was so much fun to watch Bryson with all of the animals. He was in Heaven! Anything having to do with being outdoors and animals is right up his alley. He is growing up too fast, as we could hardly keep up with him as he ran from place to place. We were worried that he might fall asleep in the truck on the way home and then not take a good nap, but he talked the entire way! He was exhausted and conked out the minute we got home.

What an amazing day! Visiting Miracle Farm is definitely on our to-do list for next Spring.

Friends and Spontaneity

"I adore spontaneity, providing it is carefully planned."

-Unknown

It is no secret that I am a planner. I love to have things planned out and to know what every day holds. My actual paper planner {yes- I still use one of these!} is my lifeline. So, I am obviously not the best at being spontaneous. I am trying, though...

Last Friday afternoon Jason and Jared had the kids at the park. I had been charting for work for a few hours and was exhausted! I met them at the park and requested Mexican food for dinner. I called Kristin and she met us at our house after work. Mexican food it would be!

We took the kids and actually enjoyed our time in a restaurant. With a rambunctious two-year-old we usually leave restaurants saying "Did we just pay for that experience?" Since the kids are getting a little bit better, and have each other to entertain themselves, this adventure has actually become much more enjoyable.

After dinner the MacDonalds came back to our house. I had baked sugar cookies for Easter and they just needed to be iced. Kristin and I had a great time icing cookies while the men sat in the garage and let the kids play. We all had a great time. And yes- we did save cookies for the kids to ice. It was a great, unplanned, evening! Summer is sure to hold lots more of these impromptu nights. Can't wait!

 We thought Kristin's cookie ended up looking like the Pepsi symbol...

 The kids were playing great outside so we decided to go ahead and make some chocolate covered Oreos, too! They were delicious!

So blessed by time with sweet friends!

Grace Girls Getaway

The last weekend in March I got to head out of town for a girls only getaway weekend. Grace Bible Church hosted a conference in The Woodlands. My sweet friends Allison, Erin, and I were lucky enough to get to leave Friday morning.

 We arrived in The Woodlands just in time for a fabulous lunch at P.F. Chang's {one of my all-time favorites!}, and then enjoyed some shopping at The Woodlands Mall. It was so relaxing and just plain fun. Yes- I did just say that. We laughed and laughed, bought gun necklaces, and then laughed some more. Sometimes, you just need to be with the girls.

 After checking into our hotel we met Megan and Michelle for some delicious Italian food.

Me and Erin

 Allison and Megan T.

Lisa Smart was the speaker for the event. She is hilarious! She provided an entertaining message full of truth and wisdom. Her main focus was on Colossians 2:13-14:

13 When you were stuck in your old sin-dead life, you were incapable of responding to God. God brought you alive - right along with Christ! Think of it! All sins forgiven, 14 the slate wiped clean, that old arrest warrant canceled and nailed to Christ's Cross.  

(The Message)

Her question was simple: Where do you find your identity?

Is it in your children? Your job? Your marriage? Your material possessions?

And her answer was even better: Our identity is found in Christ alone. He has nailed everything else to the cross. All of those other things will. fail. you. HE is the only one who will not.

So I completely simplified that {and probably butchered it in the process}- but you get the idea. We sang songs of worship and enjoyed group time to process through what Lisa was talking about. I even got to enjoy time with one of my friends from nursing school. It was an amazing time of fellowship.

We came home Saturday evening feeling refreshed and encouraged.

I am so thankful that I had this opportunity to recharge and connect with these sweet, sweet friends.

Already looking forward to next year!

Surprise!

A few weeks ago Bryson got a surprise in the mail from Heather...

Isn't it cute?!? And it matches his cape. What could be better?
Thank you, Heather!!!

D-Day

April 3. I'm not sure how it snuck up on me so quickly. Today is the day I was originally given as a due date when I found out I was pregnant with my sweet Caroline. Of course, I know that if the surgery had been successful I would have been fortunate to carry her to the 30 week mark, which would have been in February; and if she would not have had spina bifida I would have probably delivered about a week ago via c-section. That means I would have just been home for a few days now and that we would probably just be getting settled in as a family of four.

I am surrounded by babies and pregnancy. The two other girls in my home church (we were all due within one month of each other) have both had their beautiful baby girls. One night I held one of them (her name is Courtney), for a long time during a girls' night while we watched a movie. She was so tiny and precious, and smelled of that perfect baby smell. It was such a bittersweet time for me. I soaked up every moment of it, and tried not to show the true awkwardness that I felt. My closest friends felt it too, or at least wondered, and asked me later, what I was thinking. In truth, I don't know exactly what I was thinking. I think that the Lord gave me that time with baby Courtney as a time of healing. I was in such a safe environment and knew that even if I did burst into tears it would be okay. But no tears came. It was just a tiny bit of sorrow mixed with a whole lot of joy. Funny how those two keep coming together.

Now two other home church friends have joined the pregnant group. I can honestly (and thankfully) say that I am loving walking this journey with each of them. I know that the prayers of other have played a big role in that. God has provided what we have needed EVERY. STEP. OF. THE. WAY. There is no other explanation for the way things have turned out. We will always give Him the glory in that.

Please continue to pray for us as we walk in the days ahead. We have some tough decisions to make but I know that all will end well. For now, we are focusing on the journey itself, knowing that God is with us as we walk each and every step.

With all that I am and all that I have I wish that my sweet girl was here tonight. I wish that I was exhausted from taking care of a fussy baby and that my sink was full of bottles and breast pump equipment. But, in the end, I know this life is short. I know that we will be with Caroline for eternity and that provides a peace that may even sound foolish to some. This peace is truly a gift.

And last but not least- tonight as I was tucking Bryson into bed he asked for his Caroline bear (he sleeps with it every night). He said "Baby Caroline's with Jesus. Is she crying?" I think he automatically associates babies with crying. I told him that there is no crying when we go to be with Jesus. I told him that Caroline is healthy and so happy, and can't wait to see her big brother Bryson one day. Then Bryson said, "That's right, there's no crying with Jesus."

What a sweet reminder from my sweet boy.